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superior timepiece for those who need not ask for the price
This is an outstanding timepiece. Almost as stylish as a Casio G-Shock at only a little more (say perhaps 5,000 times more) than its plebeian competition. Not only that, it keeps time to within perhaps 1 or 2 minutes per day!

I have the 23rd of the 25 produced and could not be more proud of myself for investing some modest retained earnings in this outstanding example of the horological art. Once I draped it on my wrist it depreciated by 99.995%, an excellent outcome according to my accountant and trustees.

Highly recommended to my peers, if there indeed are any.

Secret of 'black ceramic'
I've been thoroughly satisfied with my Turdbillion. Those of you out there considering one may be interested to know the painstaking efforts that have gone into the atmospheric reentry-proof black glaze on this massterpiece. The designers were inspired by a love of kopi luwak, a rather inferior vietnamese coffeebean, that, when harvested from the feces of the civet, was remarkably smoother. The realized they might similarly improve on their product, feeding the watches to homeless alcoholics, provided their stool, as a function of liver disease sequela, was sufficiently black. After much trial and error, one satisfactory producer was identified. Unfortunately, he choked on the 26th watch. On the bright side, you can own a substantial share of the only meaningful remnants of that street urchin's blessed bowels for less than 0k.

The Watch
I have a problem... you see, i have a personality that is as smooth as cheap beer, and my special bits look like hamburger on the sidewalk. needless to say i needed help with the lady's, I'm not particularly wealthy but there had to be a way to attract the b***ches with daddy issues, you know, with big personality's, two of em. then I saw this watch. I really didn't care for it, but the price tag said "I can make you sexy and poor" one of those things i wanted... but how to generate enough money to pay for such a watch? easy, every year rich alcoholics burn there livers to a smoldering heap of ash and they need new ones. after a few back ally meetings the deal was set, the watch for my insides. the operation was a success, but the rich dude died, oops, one of the risks of preforming surgery in Tijuana, needless to say, i got the watch and a lovely fruit basket. I still don't get laid, but i have a friggen sweet watch and a empty basket.